Do You Need an Accountant…or Therapy? Why Financial Trauma Holds Entrepreneurs Back
Unpacking Financial Trauma in Entrepreneurship
Money talk makes people squirm. As a CPA, I see it all the time: new clients show up to our Zoom call with their shoulders tense and their eyes darting anywhere but the numbers. They tell me, "I know I should be better at this," or "I'm just really bad with money."
But here’s the truth: most of the time, it’s not about math skills or even financial literacy. It’s about something much more profound. For many small business owners, entrepreneurs, and freelancers, financial shame isn’t about numbers - it’s about trauma.
Let’s talk about it.
What Is Financial Trauma?
Financial trauma is a strong, often negative emotional response to money that’s rooted in past experiences. It can come from growing up in poverty, being in debt, witnessing family financial instability, or being repeatedly shamed about money. It can also come from sudden job loss, economic abuse, or systemic discrimination in how financial resources are distributed.
It's a trauma like any other and will live in our nervous system until we deal with it.
Financial trauma can show up as:
Avoidance: unopened envelopes, never checking your bank account.
Anxiety: panic attacks when thinking about taxes or invoicing.
Shame: believing you’re “bad with money” or not smart enough to run a business.
Perfectionism: assuming that if your books aren’t perfect, you’re a failure.
Emotional flooding: shutting down entirely at the mention of numbers.
It’s not your fault. And more importantly, you’re not alone.
Why It Looks Like Being "Bad at Finances"
So many people come to me thinking that what they need is help organizing their books. And yes, sometimes that’s part of it. But often, they already know how to make a budget. They’ve used spreadsheets. They’ve tracked receipts. But they avoid it, because money feels unsafe.
It’s not that you’re bad at money. It’s that money has been made to feel dangerous.
You were never meant to learn financial systems through panic and shame. But that’s how so many of us were taught. So, of course, it feels hard.
And if you’re a woman, queer, racialized, neurodivergent, or disabled? There’s a good chance the messages you received about money growing up weren’t just confusing - they were explicitly disempowering. You were told not to talk about money. That you shouldn’t worry your pretty little head about it. That you weren’t capable.
You were told it wasn’t for you.
From the Desk of an Accountant Who Sees It All
When someone reaches out to work with me, I can often tell how they feel about their finances just from their intake form.
If they seem nervous, overwhelmed, or apologetic, I get it. I’ll intentionally steer the conversation away from money at first. We’ll talk about their dog. Their art. The business they dreamed up and built from nothing. And the moment I shift into finances, I watch their body language change. Shoulders curl inward. Tone flattens. Eye contact disappears.
Sometimes I steer the conversation back away again. I don’t want to trigger anyone. I know what it means to feel vulnerable around money.
I’m not a therapist. But sometimes, I feel like my job is 80% emotional support and 20% accounting.
And that’s the part I want to talk about more.
When You Might Need a Therapist, Not Just an Accountant
There’s a big difference between needing help sorting out your finances and needing support unpacking your relationship to money.
An accountant can help you:
Catch up on bookkeeping
File taxes or back taxes
Build a financial strategy
Set up a system that works
But if the idea of even looking at a spreadsheet causes panic? If you feel paralyzed every time you sit down to do admin? If money makes you feel ashamed, broken, or afraid?
That’s not a numbers problem. That’s trauma.
And it doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.
Therapy Is a Financial Tool
Just like you’d go to physiotherapy before training for a marathon, you might need therapy before tackling your business finances.
Therapy can help you:
Build safety and regulation around money
Unlearn shame and internalized capitalism
Replace self-judgment with self-compassion
Identify what money means to you (and where that came from)
Rebuild your confidence and your voice
That’s why I often recommend Help Clinic Canada to clients who are struggling with financial trauma. They offer virtual, accessible therapy across Canada, with clinicians from diverse backgrounds, in multiple languages, and using a variety of approaches. It’s affordable, inclusive, and grounded in the belief that healing should be accessible to everyone.
What Healing Can Look Like (Even While You’re Still Behind on Your Books)
Here’s what I want you to know:
You don’t have to "fix" everything overnight. Healing your relationship with money takes time. It takes unlearning and rebuilding. And yes, it takes patience.
But you can take a two-part approach:
Therapy: Start here if your nervous system is in fight/flight/freeze around money. Get the tools, language, and support you need to feel safer.
Accounting support: When you’re ready, bring in someone who can meet you where you’re at. Look for a professional who leads with compassion, not shame. (Hi, I know one.)
You might go back and forth. You might need both at once. That’s okay.
Healing and strategy can co-exist. But sometimes the healing has to come first.
What If Money Could Feel Safe?
Let’s get curious.
What would it feel like if money didn’t make you panic?
What would it feel like if you could open a spreadsheet without feeling like a failure?
What if finances weren’t the thing you avoid, but the thing that makes you feel grounded?
You’re not bad at money. You’ve just been handed a broken map.
It’s time to stop blaming yourself and start finding tools that work for you.
Final Thoughts: You Are Not Broken
If no one’s ever told you this before, let me be the first: a messy financial past does not mean you’re a mess.
You followed your dream. You started something out of nothing. That is already a win.
The shame you’re carrying? It doesn’t belong to you. It was handed to you by systems that benefit when people stay small, quiet, and overwhelmed.
You don’t need to carry it anymore.
If you’re a socially conscious entrepreneur in Canada and you’re ready to start untangling your relationship with money, I’m here for you. Reach out HERE!
If you’re looking for emotional support to help you feel safe with your finances, visit Help Clinic Canada to find a therapist who understands your experience.
Financial clarity doesn’t have to come from hustle and grind. Sometimes, it starts with compassion.
You deserve that.